Most three-year-olds come out with a plethora of poignant one-liners everyday. A plethora? Oh yes, a plethora. After experiencing one, I usually laugh, smile with pride, make a mental note of what was said so I can later blog about it, and then I promptly forget what was said. This happens all the time. Here are a few from today that stuck.

In the morning rush to get ready for school, the bathroom door is sometimes mistakenly left open. Sebastian’s finely-tuned radar immediately kicks in and he makes a bee-line for either the medicine cabinet or the toilet. Today it was the medicine cabinet. It was only a matter of seconds before the crash of Jan’s mascara bottle shattering against the floor was heard. Jan left Emily to clean the bathroom floor but it wasn’t long before Emily appeared at the bathroom door with mop in hand eagerly saying, “Mummy, shall I pom it?” Ah, our darling little dyslexic.

I Draw The Line Here

After school, we went to the park. We did the whole slide thing and took a few turns on the swings before Emily ran over to a bench and started taking off her sandals. I asked her why she was taking off her sandals and she replied, “Because I want to.” This is her answer for most things nowadays. So she hands me her sandals and starts walking along the row of benches when she freezes in her tracks, cautiously inspects the bench beneath her feet, and quietly asks me, “Is there spit on the bench?” There was not, and I have yet to learn the back story to her inquiry. Odd.

Cheeky Tree Elf

Dinner tonight consisted of a lovely rice dish with a few cherry tomatoes on the side. Emily and I have this inside joke where, every time we place a cherry tomato in our mouths and bite down, we have to make a face like there was a huge explosion. It’s very funny, really. Once the tomato juice settled, Emily declared, “I like tomatoes!” But she said ‘tomahtoes’ like here mum would pronounce it. So I offered in the usual sing-song way, “I say ‘tomato’, you say ‘tomahto.'” Always on her toes, Emily quickly improvised (in the correct sing-song fashion), “You say ‘avocado’, I say… ‘fokatto!!'” I have no idea where she comes up with these. I don’t think I want to know.