Happy eight month birthday, Emily.

The most monumental human accomplishment at this stage of life (and the most nebulous) is the development of an actual personality. And I determine the completion of a personality by one’s ability to successfully fill out a MySpace profile. Yes, I caught Emily messing around with online social networks the other day. Here is a snippet from her now substantial member profile:

Emily’s Details
Age: 8 months
Height: 67 cm (26 in)
Weight: 7.75 kg (17 lb)
Here for: Networking
Zodiac sign: Virgo
Children: just me
Education: School of Hard Knocks
Music: Kill Bill I Soundtrack
Television: Baby Einstein, Simpsons
Books: let’s find Jack’s hidden treasure!
Heroes: Maya Angelou, Oprah Winfrey, Tina Fey

She wasn’t able to fill out half of this just a month ago.

Alright, I know what you’re here for. Like so many of Pavlov’s dogs, you’re here on the 6th of the month (or soon thereafter) to learn what mischief/accomplishments Emily has been up to this past month. Well look no further…

• I’m pretty sure Emily is sitting as sturdily as she ever will. Plop her on her tuchus and she can play with her toys or watch TV for as long as she wants – she’s good for days. I know adults who fall over more often than Emily. And not only can she sit, but she can usually find her way to the sitting position! It’s a complicated process from back to bum involving splits, rolls, and one arm push-ups that, although already accomplished on more than one occasion, is still in the refinement phase.
• You thought sitting was impressive? Well what about standing? That’s right. Emily has always expressed a penchant for standing over sitting and she is now able to pull herself on to her feet while holding on to the sofa for dear life. This usually results in a flash episode of vertigo, awkward leg buckling, giving in to gravity, and the inevitable tears.
• Similar to standing, Emily loves bouncing. Sure, she’ll bounce a bit if you hold her hands while she’s standing, but she’ll bounce like nobody’s business when you stick her in her Tigger Doorway Bouncer! You’d better take two steps back because this girl will bounce like a lunatic for upwards of 30 minutes at a time without breaking a sweat. She loves Tigger so much that the mere sight of him makes her squeal with joy – a cute yet at the same time frightening squeal that very few things can elicit. Those few things being mommy or daddy after an extended absence or The Fish hanging in her room. She loves those Fish.
• Squeals. Shrieks. Monster roars. Ba ba ba’s. Ma ma ma’s. Da da da’s. The the the’s. Sweet little whispers to The Fish. Emily is increasing her vocabulary.
• It’s unbearably adorable when Emily holds her arms out indicating that she would like you to pick her up. Sometimes you get a sweet cuddle. And sometimes, once in your arms, she holds her arms out to the couch indicating she wants to go back down. And then she holds her arms out to Tigger. Repeat.
• Emily loves dogs. If she’s in her push chair on the street and a dog walks by, she goes totally mental. She’s tried to pet one on more than one occasion, but she either chickens out or ends up yanking his ears and we need to separate them before carnage ensues. Dogs: she loves ’em.
• Two bottom teeth were cute, but Emily abhors asymmetry. So in just under a month, she has pushed through her two top teeth, as well, completing her ingenious beaver disguise while at the same time striking fear in to the hearts of breast feeders everywhere.
• Have teeth will eat. In addition to her regular doses of mommy milk, we’ve been feeding Emily three square meals a day. Fruit for breakfast, stew for lunch, and cereal for dinner. Old favorites include banana and carrots mixed with rice cereal while new favorites include kiwi, pear, chicken, and beef. This girl eats better than I do! She’s normally a very good eater but it’s not uncommon for her to get totally distracted with a shadow on the wall or a lump of food on her hand and then you basically have to sound an air raid siren to get her attention again.
• OK, we went to IKEA on Jan’s birthday about three weeks ago. Emily loved it. We spent 20 minutes making faces and slapping reflections in the mirror department, 15 minutes test driving all of the cribs and toys in the baby department, and then we went to the carpet department. We found the thickest, loveliest carpet in the whole store and plotzed Emily down on top of it. At first she just lied there, inspecting and tickling the shag. Then she started rolling – from one end of the rug to the other. She rolled back and forth until a small crowd began to gather. Then, in front of these complete strangers, on a 400 euro rug, on Jan’s birthday, in IKEA, Emily decided to start crawling! It was one of those army crawls that she’ll need one day to pass under barbed wire when on the lam. Over the course of the past three weeks she has only improved both her style and efficiency. Yesterday I found her pushing buttons on the DVD player and trying to pull Jan’s Friends box set off the bottom shelf of the entertainment center. We have to seriously consider baby-proofing the house sometime in the immediate future.
• Emily celebrated her eight month birthday last night by setting a new personal record of going eight hours without a feed. A promising sign of a bright tomorrow.

I know I haven’t posted any new photo albums for the past few months and I am sorry. Please accept this new collection of fantastic Emily photos along with the promise of more in the coming months.

Click here to see a slide show of the new photos.

Click here to view the photos in their natural habitat on my Flickr page.

Click here to see pictures of cats so funny that you just might poop.

The newest family photo

Gentle, gentle, gentle!